An Irishman goes to the Doctor with botty problems....
Irishman: "Dactor, it's me ahrse. I'd loik ya ta teyhk a look, if ya woot."
Doctor: he get's him to drop his pants and takes a look. Incredible" he says, "there is a £20 note lodged up here." Tentatively he eases the twenty pound note out of the man's bottom, but then a £10 note appears. "This is amazing!" exclaims the Doctor. "What do you want me to do?"
Irishman: Well fur gadness sake teyhk it out, man!" shrieks the patient.
Doctor: pulls out the tenner and another twenty appears, and another and another and another, etc.... Finally the last note comes out and no more appears.
Irishman: "Ah Dactor, tank ya koindly, dat's moch batter, how moch is dare den?"
Doctor: counts the pile of cash. "£1,990 exactly."
Irishman: "Ah, dat'd be roit," says the Irishman, "I knew I wasn't feeling two grand."