31 October 2009

Saturday Satire - The Wisdom of Doctors

A man goes to see his doctor feeling very unwell and is immediately rushed to the hospital to undergo a barrage of extensive tests.

He wakes up after the tests in a private room at the hospital. Then the phone by his bed rings, he answers it.

"This is your doctor. We've had the results back from your tests and we've found you have an extremely nasty virus, which is extremely contagious!"

"Oh my God," cries the man."What are you going to do doctor?"

"Well, for now we are going to put you on a diet of pizzas, pancakes and pita bread."

"So that will cure then, doctor?" asked the man hopefully.

The doctor replied,"Well no...... but its the only food we can get under the door."

30 October 2009

Wastage this weekend

For those of you who will buy pumpkins just for the ability to carve them and put candles in them on Saturday, please consider using the flesh rather than wasting it..

I don't celebrate Halloween though if the neighbours children want to tuck into some sweets that's fine by me though I don't like the idea of playing tricks as these can get out of hand with eggs being thrown and as a result being banned from sale at this time.. I know bit of a killjoy really...lol

Instead I see 31st October as Samhain (pronounced so wain) as Summers End, a time when we formally suspend the sun and warmth of Summer together with their harvests and head into the chills of wintertime brrrh.

I have been busy trying to come up with some useful ways of utilising the flesh and seeds..

Seeds, you can bake them in the oven for a tasty snack, try sprinkling on some spices to pep them up a bit. To see how to do this go to this site and prepare for some ooey-gooeyness from Ginny Larsen

Steam the flesh of the pumpkin and blitz in a food processor along with some stock (either vegetable or chicken) and then serve with crispy bread rolls - you can spice it up with chilli or with curry spice to give more depth.

Or you could do an Asian Chicken recipe or my personal favourite and one to try is these gorgeously moist Chocolate Brownies

29 October 2009

YoTs - Updated with new information

What makes a YoT 'Youf of Today' believe that it was cool to stamp on a puppy's head and kill it?

April had only put Sandy down for a minute and curiosity made the pup run over to the group of teenage boys who stamped on her with such force that her tiny skull was fractured. I can't think of a more callous act against a helpless creature, or the pain it would have inflicted on her young owner.

I hope that the local police catch up with them, but nothing will erase that memory from April's mind though I hope she takes solace with her family and get a new pup soon to fill the aching gap of Sandy's death.

Update :

An inquiry into the "kicking to death" of a 10-week-old puppy has ended after police found the animal had died from a virus and showed no sign of injury.

The Jack Russell was being walked by its owner, a 15-year-old girl, in Priory Park, St Neots, on Monday, when the RSPCA said it was attacked.

An RSPCA spokeswoman had called the attack "shocking and sickening".

But Cambridgeshire Police have now ended their investigation after veterinary tests.

An RSPCA spokeswoman said the charity had been informed of the ending of the investigation.

She said the first vet consulted had told the RSPCA that the dog's condition was consistent with the account given by the puppy's owners of the attack.

She said anyone with more information or any witnesses should contact the RSPCA.

I can remember thinking that a 10 week old puppy really shouldn't be walked in the park, before its innoculations had been done, but I would hope that they didn't make up the story of the attack to cover their actions.

28 October 2009

Happy Birthday

To a special person... there for me when I have needed you most... thanks xx

Have a great day, and most of all enjoy it

27 October 2009


The hidden truth... I watched (loose description of my tv viewing last night) the Channel 4 programme about the amount of sugar and salt in cereals and my flabber was well and truly ghasted..

They got a group of adults to place well known brands of breakfast cereals on a grid which went from low salt, low sugar to high salt, high sugar and every variety inbetween. Needless to say, two well known brands of corn flakes and rice crispies were placed in the low salt low sugar range and actually fell into one of the highest brackets. Now I love my cornflakes, and while I don't tend to now buy the premium well known brands (preferring the supermarket own) I was horrified to think that these were adding sugar and salt to my diet that I hadn't considered.

I don't add extra sugar to my cereals, finding them palatable enough, but even so I might have to reconsider what breakfast cereal to buy, and just to confuse you more, the little nutrition boxes on the sides of the cereal boxes can be really confusing. I prefer the traffic light system that Sainsbug uses on the majority of goods as that is really helpful.

One experiment they did do with a family was to remove all the high sugar cereals from one family with children, and replace it with porridge, fresh fruit and eggs.. in a week they went down from having 300g of sugar from breakfast alone to just 30g under the new diet.

Going back to have another look in my cupboard tonight... guess my shopping list in future is going to be up for discussion..

26 October 2009

It's an Official Rant

I don't have many, rants that is, but it really gets my goat up when the powers that be start talking we should fall into line with Europe on the clocks front.. why?

I am british, born british, educated across the world, lived in Europe for 3 years and loved it, travel in-frequently to world-wide destinations and done business with both the European Sector and Americans/Canadians during my time here at the University of the Back of Beyond.

First and Foremost : London, England is the home of Greenwich Mean Time which started when British sailors kept at least one chronometer on GMT in order to calculate their longitude from the Greenwich meridian, which was by convention considered to have longitude zero degrees

Shipboard time itself was still solar time. But this practice, combined with mariners from other nations eventually led to GMT being used worldwide as a reference time independent of location.

Most time zones were based upon this reference as a number of hours and half-hours "ahead of GMT" or "behind GMT". So when they talk about us joining the same European time as Spain, which is many degrees further South than London, or even Italy it makes no sense to me as their days will be different to that of London, in terms of daylight.

Secondly : On a business level, I have managed successfully the 12 hour differences between UK and Australia when talking to a firm providing software to us, likewise the 5, 7 or 8 hour differences between zones in the US and Canada so I can find no good reason to align us to Europe for the one hour that exists.

Not only that but our friends in Scotland would be heavily penalised by the time differences involved and yet another wave of power would be held in European hands..

There seems to be no pride in keeping Britain British, instead we weakly surrender ourselves to our European Neighbours and while their interpretation of the rules can be somewhat elastic, we Brits follow it to the letter of the law.

I want to keep Greenwich Mean Time, for the history of what it means to our country, for what it means to us as a people and not just surrender it meekly because of a weak excuse of business needs... What say you?

25 October 2009

Fictional Fear

I used to be absolutely scared stiff of watching Doctor Who, I remember peering out from behind the sofa in sheer terror at hearing the music yet drawn to the tv to ensure that the Doctor made it through the episode, particularly if the Daleks were involved (please note that I was only about 5 or 6 at the time).

I used to be an avid fan of Hammer House of Horror films, Vincent Price, Christopher Lee specialists in conferring fear into their watchers... but it was still good fun to watch as it wasn't so realistics as today's horror films such as Saw etc.

Nothing on television has been quite as terrifying as the above that is until the advent of Harper's Island which was shown recently on BBC3 and I watched it on the BBC Iplayer for which thank you very much BBC as I watched it with the same sort of fear as I had during my childhood.

The story is based on the wedding of Henry Dunn and Trish Wellington, which takes place in Harper's Island. Abby Mills, one of the guests is still haunted about the murders on the island that happened seven years before, caused by John Wakefield.

The murders are particularly shocking and horrific, and starts from the very beginning of the first episode until the last moment... and holds you enthralled as to who was the murderer and what are the connections between the victims.

If you like a good murder mystery, being scared witless and great scenery (it was filmed on Bowen Island - Canada) then do try and catch this series if it is repeated near you... and enjoy the fear.. just remember it is fictional and don't have nightmares..

24 October 2009

Saturday Satire - Marriage

On their way to get married, a young Catholic couple is involved in a fatal car accident. The couple find themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven.

While waiting, they begin to wonder: Could they possibly get married in Heaven? When St. Peter showed up, they asked him. St. Peter says, “I don’t know. This is the first time anyone has asked. Let me go find out”, and he leaves.

The couple sat and waited, and waited. Two months passed and the couple is still waiting. As they waited, they discussed that IF they were allowed to get married in Heaven, what was the eternal aspect of it all. What if it doesn’t work?” they wondered, “Are we stuck together FOREVER?”

After yet another month, St. Peter finally returns, looking somewhat bedraggled. “Yes,” he informs the couple, “You CAN get married in Heaven.”

“Great!” said the couple, “But we were just wondering, what if things don’t workout? Could we also get a divorce in Heaven?”

St. Peter, red-faced with anger, slams his clipboard onto the ground.

“What’s wrong?” asked the frightened couple.

“OH, COME ON!” shouts St. Peter. “It took me three months to find a priest up here! Do you have ANY idea how long it’ll take me to find a LAWYER?”

23 October 2009

A Heavy Heart Remembers

Today, two years ago, my heart was heavy as I made the last journey to the vets with Sam my beloved Jack Russell Terrier who was 17 years old but had reached the end of his days.

He was struggling to manage, and working all day meant I couldn't watch over him to ensure that he was comfortable and coping with the day to day living. If he went out into the garden, he couldn't remember how to get back into the house, life became bewildering to him with the little sight that he had and I can remember crying when I came home to find him cold and in the garden not knowing how long he had been out there..

He didn't want his favourite treat of cheese, something he was always guaranteed to do. He just wanted to be held by me, and when I phoned the vets to book him in, he just turned to look at me as if to say I had done the right thing as it was his time to leave.

Sam was a dog who was always a people dog, but took no notice of the vets that day, and they agreed that the time had come.

I am in tears as I write this, just remembering that day, yet the pictures I have of him show his character, and one day I will again have a dog when I have time to give him the lifestyle he will deserve, it won't be Sam being replaced for how do you replace something so unique?

22 October 2009

Last Night

I had the pleasure of attending one of the Open University's 40th Anniversary Lectures.. this one was given by Philip Pullman who is an honarary graduate of the OU.

Philip was to discuss the relationship between the story and the illustration, I have tried to read the Dark Materials Trilogy without success, nor manage to listen to the audiobooks, and as for the film...well the less said about that the better.

Philip discussed the borderland of a story, that's the bits that aren't written down to you and me. In other words, the story sets a scene, it may describe a place, a tavern, dark and warm with a nice fire and beer flowing. Your vision of the inn will be different to mine, drawing on our own experiences of life... I have always said that to me reading a book is like making my own film, I read the words and convert it to my own personal film show; I am caught up in my own imagination sometimes and it is hard to come back to the real world.

An excellent evening, I might even have another attempt at his books :-)

So otherwise why go, well it is a free evening out, includes tea and coffee, a chance to meet fellow OU students and Alumni and well I think that's enough to go on for now and yes as an Alumni of the Open University, I can recommend it to anyone interested in non-standard education and by that I mean going to University, yes you might miss out on the social life at many Universities.

Hmm that student that got so drunk that he peed all over a war memorial was at a freshers week and this was an organised piss-up... not something to be proud of in times to come.

Living in student accommodation, halls of residence away from the comforts of home and friends... can be depressing for some students trying to cope with the dramatic changes of being alone and stressed over course work.

The negatives of studying with the OU are many as well, sometimes lack of tutor support, distance learning can be isolating, particularly if you are in the higher level courses, ambiguous course materials, never ending assignment lists etc...

It is one heck of an achievement and one I am proud of being a member of this University with my BSc Open

21 October 2009

Update on the ratz

Thought I would catch you up on the news of the ratz..

Gus and Barnie have really settled in, rarely now do you get a nip (or even a bite) from them now, though I am still more cautious with Barnie as her eyesight is so poor that with her it is more of a retaliation than vicious.

They both usually wait at the doorway to their cage first thing in the morning for their breakfast treat which might be anything from a cracker, a dog biscuit or even piece of pasta... in the evening we usually spend time playing while Gus chatters to me asking (pleading even) for her yoghurt drop which is usually forthcoming...

Gus is happy to come out and sit on my shoulders while I clean the shelves and the rest of the cage, Barnie on the other hand is more reserved and will sit quite happily in her hammock while I do this.. I don't mind at all as it is hard enough to control one rat without two running around.

Their favourite treat of all time is cheese, they don't get this very often.. as it is full of fat and bad calories... but they have come to know and love their yoghurt drops, with dried coconut as their other favourite..

Most of my visitors, viewing the house, have been very positive about the ratz even going so far as to praise them.... which is opposite to most peoples views when you tell them you have pet rats..

Hopefully I will be able to get some pictures, but I have to be a bit careful.. don't want to scare them..

20 October 2009

How Stupid and Bureaucratic Can You Get - updated

British Legion to be charged for Remembrance Day service road closures

I have just read on our local, regional scandal rag newsheet that the whitless wonders who govern Back of Beyondshire are about to implement what can only be considered stupid and Bureaucratic nonsense.

Honouring the war dead will cost The Royal British Legion in Back of Beyondshire £150 for every Remembrance Sunday service where a road is closed.

Towns and villages within the Back of Beyondshire Council area will be charged to cover the cost of advertising road closure public notices for the November 8 events.

Margaret Roberts, regional manager for The Royal British Legion, said: “The Royal British Legion would be extremely disappointed if charges were to be levied against the charity for Remembrance events.

“The Government fully recognises and wholly supports the importance of Remembrance ceremonies and parades to local communities, and the Legion wants people of all ages to understand the importance of remembering those from the British armed forces who have made the ultimate sacrifice defending the freedoms we enjoy.” Among those needing to close roads for their Remembrance events will be Flitwick and Shefford, which will need to close the High Street in order to hold the service next to its war memorial.

Shefford town mayor Paul Mackin said: “Shefford Town Council is pretty disgusted with the fact that someone is going to have to cough up £150 so we can hold a service to mark our heroes’ Remembrance Sunday Service.

“For them to come up with having to pay for the road closure notices is absolutely disgraceful.

“It’s unreasonable to be hitting charities for this sort of money.” Cllr David McVicar, portfolio holder for safer and stronger communities at Back of Beyondshire Council, said: “We will always offer help and assistance to any group requesting a road closure.

“Although there are road closure charges to all profit making organisations, under the Special Events Order, if the event is run purely for charity, there is no charge other than the advertising cost of £150.

“Back of Beyondshire Council classes Remembrance Day as a charitable event.”

For the Love of God, can we not just deem this something special rather than just another charitable cause.. the one time in the year to remember the fallen, not only of the first and second world wars, but the ones who are currently serving now...

Well something worked as this was the response I got to an email I sent to the twit in question

A further press release has been issued correcting the misinterpretation by Back of Beyondshire on Sunday regarding Remembrance Day Services. We will NOT be charging for any advertising relating to road closures on Nov. 8th. The misunderstanding arose from an explanation on how we intend to treat charity applications and our process for future years with regard to Remembrance Day. Rest assured no charges will be levied on the Legion for future years as we will post one advertisement covering all of Central Back of Beyondshire and the Council will absorb the cost. I trust this clarifies the situation.

With regards Councillor David McVicar
Portfolio Holder for Safer and Stronger Communities
Member for Icknield Ward, Dunstable

Hmmm I don't particularly like the phrase "our process for future years with regard to Remembrance Day" it smacks of trying to slide this one through under the wire in future years... not if I can help it..

I would like to ...

Introduce you to a blog I am reading... otherwise known as Traction Man, incarcertated in hospital for weeks, he has taken to blogging about the standard of hospital meals.... he is witty and full of humour despite his situation and really worth a visit from all of you to wish him well and commiserate on his meals which are exceedingly bad by all accounts.

Traction Man

I am lucky in that I have not spent much time in hospital, thankfully, and given the state of the meals glad that I haven't. Surely we can do better for both patients, prisoners and children than seemingly we are able to?

What do you think?

19 October 2009

Roasted Squash

I feel autumnal, the need to nest and hibernate is strong.. the lure of a nice dark, warm cave increasingly attractive lol...

So to while away the weekend, I made a batch of Roasted Squash goodies... which included soup, tart and tortilla roll bakes....

First of all I roasted my butternut squash, a favourite of mine, first of all rubbed with garlic and olive oil then baked until softened and browned..

For the soup scoop 1/3 of the flesh out of the tough skin and added to some vegetable stock and blitz until smooth, return to the pan and add some fresh corn, peas and tomatoes to the mixture.. serve with crusty fresh bread.

For the tart, roll out some puff pastry, into a rectangle, or smaller squares, and put 1/3 of the flesh roughly chopped onto the pastry, put some chopped tomatoes on, and top with grated mozzarella cheese (or you can use a blue cheese such as cambozola).. I dusted with some dried herbs and mustard mix, but go with your own flavours. Put in a hot oven for 20 mins until the pastry is cooked, serve in slices with a herb salad and fresh crusty bread.

Lastly the remaining 1/3 of squash mix chop up and add to some softened onion's and garlic mix and put them in rolled up tortilla's (makes 2)... place in an ovenproof dish, and cover with a tomato based sauce, I used spanish chicken sauce from the Knorr range. Sprinkle with a strong cheese, either mature cheddar or you can use mozarella.. and bake for 20-25 mins in a moderate oven... these taste delicious and make a greate vegetarian option for meals.


17 October 2009

Saturday Satire - The Wisdom of Lecturers

One night, four college students were partying until late and did not study for an exam which was scheduled for the next day.

In the morning, they thought of a plan.

They made themselves look as dirty and greasy as possible.

Then they went to the lecturer and said that they gone out last night and on the way home their car had burst a tyre, they had no spare and they had pushed the car all the way home, and they were in no condition to do the test.

The lecturer kindly allowed them to do the re-test next day.

They thanked him and said they would be ready same time tomorrow.

They studied hard that evening and turned up for the exam ready and confident.

The lecturer said that this was a special test and all four would be required to sit in separate rooms for the exam.

They all agreed as they had prepared so well last night.

The exam consisted of one single question, worth a total of 100 marks.....

a) Front Left. b) Front Right.
c) Rear Left. d) Rear Right.

16 October 2009

Friday... at last

A whole weekend of work awaits.. the shed clearance stuff needs to be sorted into two piles, the stuff to give given away on freecycle and the remainder to be sent to the skip...

The garden needs a tidy up, the leaves swept, a new branch for the rats to run up and down on and to chew... though the old one is still good for a little while longer it will be good for them to have another one in standby.

There is some painting still to be done, mainly gloss work and a few fiddly bits that need addressing.. the majority of packing has been done, just the stuff needed for day-to day is still in the house..

The sale is progressing slowly, my buyers have now had an offer on their house, but their buyer has only just put theirs on the market... which means sadly the bungalow in Cornwall is now in doubt as they want to see movement.. still it was a risk that at the time was worth taking.. now I think we will see what is available when there is time ahead and when the contracts have been exchanged.. the option to put the stuff all into storage was always on the cards and means as cash buyers we will be in a very strong position to move quickly.. always look on the bright side.. as the more sombre side is not as good...

15 October 2009

The Cold Bites

I have returned from Cornwall with a lovely beautiful cold.. I have a red nose (just don't call me Rudolf lol), a head full of cotton wool, a throat that feels like it is coated in sandpaper and my ears keep blocking up... but apart from that this is my first cold in about 18 months so I will put up with it for the 7 days or so that it takes to go and wish it well...

It does have one drawback, in that they have postponed my flu shots until the cold has gone, so I had to reschedule it but luckily the swine flu doesn't seem to be causing as many problems as the bigwigs thought it might.

And just when I want to curl up in front of a nice fire, with some trash on television to keep me company.. the tv companies have put nothing on I want to watch... sigh.. roll on the weekend.

14 October 2009

13 October 2009

Why should MP's be treated differently

Apparently the MP's who govern this country (hmmm????) don't like the idea of paying back their expenses which were either unjustly claimed, or paid by mistake(?)... apparently they feel that this is unfair and they shouldn't have to pay anything back at all.

Tell that to the benefit claimants, who were mistakenly overpaid by a government error and forced to pay it back no matter their personal circumstances... many of whom were not in a position of having spare money at the best of times but weren't given the choice believing that the payments were correct at the time.

So tell me, why did we vote for these people and when will they be resigning their positions as surely they have made their position untenable?

I for one believe that the people who put themselves forward for these positions in power, should be above reproach and beyond theft, for that was what occurred, and unlike most thieves have been given an opportunity to pay it back rather than face the justice of the courts..

12 October 2009

A long weekend

Saw me take a trip down to Cornwall on Thursday afternoon after a teaching session, and arrive 5 1/2 hours later, tired and drained.. but had an interview at 08.30am Friday morning. A quick trip to McD's had some very salty chips... a good chat with a local copper who was buying a McFlurry... and then off to bed.

Got up at 6.00am and did some final preparations for the interview... run through the presentation I had to give, and psyche myself up for it... Arrived nice and promptly for the interview which seemed to go well until the end when I realised that they had asked nothing about what I could add to the job.. hmmm not a good sign.. feedback later from HR stated I was a strong candidate, had done a great job on the presentation which had been well researched just that there was a better candidate.. Not being stupid I quickly realised that they probably had someone in mind already and I was just making up the numbers... I just wish they were more honest in interviews.

Had a good weekend, got the kittens wearing their collars, Piran just chilled out and looked gorgeous.. Saffy went ballistic and tried to attack the collar but the family are good and will persevere as it was felt better to leave them there rather than unsettle them by moving them twice.. not something I necessarily agree with 100% but easier to go along with rather than to insist upon.

Yesterday saw the long drive back (it always seems to be longer coming back), not helped by having a bad headache en-route, which seemed to make me more tired than ever at the end... I just brought in the bits from the car that needed refridgeration.. everything else waited until this morning.. then a few tablets, a hot water bottle and bed.. all by 8pm...

10 October 2009

Saturday Satire : Rank does not always mean wise

A new Army Captain was assigned to an outfit in a remote post in the African desert. During his first inspection of the outfit, he noticed a camel hitched up behind the mess tent.

He asks the Sergeant why the camel is kept there. The nervous sergeant said, "Well sir, as you know, there are 250 men here on the post and no women. And frankly sir, sometimes the men have "urges". That's why we have the camel."

The Captain says, "Well, I can't say that I condone this, but I do understand about "urges", so the camel can stay."

About a month later, the Captain starts having his own "urges". Crazy with passion, he asks the Sergeant to bring the camel to his tent.

Putting a ladder behind the camel, the Captain stands on the ladder, pulls his pants down and has wild, frantic, insane sex with the camel. When he's done, he asks the Sergeant, "Is that how the men do it?"

"Well, no, not really, sir...they generally just climb onto the camel and ride into town where the girls are."

09 October 2009

Is it me?

Have you noticed that stairs are getting steeper, groceries are heavier and, everything is further away? Yesterday I walked to the corner and I was dumbfounded to discover how long our street had become!

And, do you know, people are less considerate now, especially the young ones. They speak in whispers all the time! If you ask them to speak up they just keep repeating themselves, endlessly mouthing the same silent message until they're red in the face! What do they think I am, a lip reader?

I also think they are much younger than I was at the same age. On the other hand, people my own age are so much older than I am. I ran into an old friend the other day and she has aged so much that shedidn't even recognize me.

I got to thinking about the poor dear while I was combing my hair this morning, and in doing so, I glanced at my own reflection. Well really, now even mirrors are not made the way they used to be!

Another thing, everyone drives so fast these days! You're risking life and limb if you happen to pull onto the dual-carriageway in front of them. All I can say is, their brakes must wear out awfully fast, the way I see them screech and swerve in my rear view mirror.

Clothing manufacturers are less civilized these days. Why else would they suddenly start labeling a size 10 or 12 dress as 18 or 20? Do they think no one notices? The people who make bathroom scales are pulling the same prank. Do they think I actually 'believe' the number I see on that scale? HA! I would never let myself weigh that much! Just who do these people think they're fooling?

I'd like to call up someone in authority to report what's going on -- but the telephone company is in on the conspiracy too: they've printed the phone books in such small type that no one could ever find a number in there!

All I can do is pass along this warning: We are under attack!

Unless something drastic happens, pretty soon everyone will have to suffer these awful indignities.

PS: I am sending this to you in a larger font size, because something has happened to my computer's fonts - they are smaller than they once were.

08 October 2009

National Poetry Day

Just to differ from the normal quoted poetry of T.S. Eliot, Keats, Donne or even Betjamin... I give you... The Oak

Love thy Life,
Young and old,
Like yon oak,
Bright in spring,

Living gold; Summer-rich
Then; and then

Gold again. All his leaves
Fallen at length,
Look, he stands,
Trunk and bough,
Naked strength.

To me, this is the epitome of all that is Autumn and English.. men of Oak.. the hard core men of England who will fight for King and Country, to protect our rights... (obviously not politicians then..lol)

So anyone want to take a guess at who wrote it? I will let you know later...

07 October 2009

Hello and welcome to

Jo from Rainbow up North

Who has kindly awarded me this Kreativ Blogger award

Of course there are a few rules ... actually 7 in question... :-)

1. Thank the person who gave this to you
Covered in the opening Statement ... tick

2. Copy the logo and place it in your blog.
See above ....tick

3. Link the person who nominated you.
Ah ha... see first line at top of post ...tick

4. Name 7 things about yourself that no one would really know.

1. I write as a hobby, action scenarios that got me into motorcycling
2. I enjoy watching american football and even understand the rules, though the ref's signals still get me confused.
3. I am easily confused with big decisions
4. I can be strong when I need to, but I doubt my own abilities
5. I am opinionated and need to see the position from the other side
6. I can knit.. basic patterns
7. I like having someone that I can take care of and who takes care of me

5. Nominate seven 'Kreativ Bloggers.'
This was easy

Dickiebo - love his sense of humour
Eliza - A girl after my own heart
Max - An American who gets me thinking about how British I am
Gemma - Someone who has had a lot to deal with over the past couple of months...
Hogday - Motorcycles are not the only thing we have in common
Kathy - I followed all her tribulations and she entertains with all her travels, trips and work
Dan - I love the stories of day to day life of Dan's World

6. Post links to the seven blogs you nominate.
Yep ... tick

7. Leave a comment on each of the blogs letting them know you nominated them.

Will do this.... but if you see them before I do.. please let them know... and pass it on

06 October 2009

Passing it On

Copied from Leanne at Somerset Seasons

1) Never in my life: will I take up skydiving... not for me

2) When I was five: I had already moved three times

3) I will never forget: the memories of my mum and dad

4) By noon I'm usually: thinking about what to have for lunch

5) Last night I: made a chicken stir-fry

6) If only I had: made the right choices when I was 20

7) There's a person I know: who can charm people with the greatest of ease

8) When I turn my head left, I see: my colleagues at their desk

9) When I turn my head right, I see: my whiteboard with a long list of tasks

10) You know I'm lying when: I cannot look you in the face because it is a dead giveaway that I am lying

11) By this time next year I: will be living in Cornwall

12) I hope that: we still have a world for the children of tomorrow

13) I have a hard time understanding: how some people can have so much and others so little - when did the world stop sharing and caring?

14) My favourite thing is: my motorbike Max

15) The world could do without: Celebrities in all the tv programmes, whatever happened to developing drama and programmes which entertained instead of paying out massive sums of money to people who are neither entertaining nor good at the task be it dance, cooking, or jumping through walls.

What about yours... if you also do this.. link back to me and let me know...

05 October 2009

Monday Musings and rants...

Thankfully apart from high winds overnight Friday into Saturday, the weather held up as mostly dry and I managed to catch up with the washing... which meant a whole pile of ironing on Sunday... sigh.. you never quite manage to get the good news without the bad.

It has turned progressively colder, the sun has lost it's summer heat and although warmish, it is definitely not hot any more...

The garden is also very, very dry. With deep earth cracks near the apple tree, I haven't seen those in quite a while. The last of the cookers were picked on Sunday, I plan on turning those into something but I haven't quite decided yet... torn between a crumble or a pie but I wish I could find the recipe my mum used to make which was a cake but like a shortcake with stewed apple in the middle of two layers...

Has anyone noticed how dire tv is on a Saturday night, if you aren't into strictly come dancing, with wannabe celebs doing their thing for over 2 hours... or wannabees trying to become celebs on the X factor... the only saving grace is watching Merlin, and even then my mind wandered elsewhere..

What happened to putting on entertainment for the family instead of falsely competing for the same audience? I don't mean Saturday night at the London Palladium, or even the Morecombe and Wise show but a family film, a good drama.. Casualty now shunted to post 9pm means no opportunity for a late night film.

I for one am sick of watching strictly come celebrity get me out of the kitchen shows... that seem to dominate the schedules.. fair enough to have competition for charities to compete for money as in the hole in the wall, but let the public do it instead of celebs.. I'm sure the charities can rustle up some jo publics to help.

Stop wasting my money, in providing celebs with air time that don't deserve it.. instead provide them with a vehicle in which they can demonstrate their acting abilities... or leave them to find a more meaningful life.

Finally I want my life back, or I am going to throw the television out...

03 October 2009

Saturday Satire : Poor Paddy

An Irishman goes to the Doctor with botty problems....

Irishman: "Dactor, it's me ahrse. I'd loik ya ta teyhk a look, if ya woot."

Doctor: he get's him to drop his pants and takes a look. Incredible" he says, "there is a £20 note lodged up here." Tentatively he eases the twenty pound note out of the man's bottom, but then a £10 note appears. "This is amazing!" exclaims the Doctor. "What do you want me to do?"

Irishman: Well fur gadness sake teyhk it out, man!" shrieks the patient.

Doctor: pulls out the tenner and another twenty appears, and another and another and another, etc.... Finally the last note comes out and no more appears.

Irishman: "Ah Dactor, tank ya koindly, dat's moch batter, how moch is dare den?"

Doctor: counts the pile of cash. "£1,990 exactly."

Irishman: "Ah, dat'd be roit," says the Irishman, "I knew I wasn't feeling two grand."

02 October 2009

One of my favourite monologues

Is Bob Newhart, with Gerard Hoffnung in a very close second with the bricklayers story and Pam Ayrs providing the british contingent she is going to be appearing at the Stables nr Milton Keynes soon and I am just debating whether to try and get a ticket or not... still makes me laugh.

Dad used to own a LP of Bob Newhart, and I can remember listening to the story of the driving instructor and having tears of laughter running down my face. Sadly he lent the record to a friend and it was never seen again.. years later I managed to find a copy on CD with some tracks I had never heard before including this one on bomb disposal; so for your delectation and amusement... here it is courtesy of this site

Er... hello, Lieutenant Stevenson here...
Patrolman Hackmaster?...
Oh! hello Willard, you're a little late reporting in aren't you, Willard?...
You've found a shell on the beach?...
You think that's unusual, do you Willard, finding a shell on the beach?...
It's not that kind of shell?...
What's the matter, Willard, doesn't it sound like the ocean when you hold it up to your ear?...
Oh! that kind of shell!...
Well, I'll tell you what, Willard, I'll send somebody out in the morning and we can er...
Oh! is that right?...
I was sort of hoping it was your watch making that noise...
I'm gonna give it to you straight, Willard. Willard, you've got a live one there!
Don't hang up...
That's an order, Willard...
And stop that whining!...
Now, you're perfectly safe, Willard, there's nothing to worry about as long as it's ticking...
Er, when it stops ticking, that's something else again, Willard.
Now, listen Willard, get control of yourself...
You and I are going to disarm that thing...
I've got the instruction manual...
Well, no! I'm not coming down there, Willard...
Well, I mean I can't just leave the office anytime I want to!...
Now look, Willard, I'm taking just as big a chance as you are, I mean, this is my responsibility, if that thing goes off, it's me they're gonna wanna to talk to, not you, ya know!
Alright now, Willard, describe it to me...
Uh... it sounds like some sort of torpedo, Willard...
It must be one of ours!...
It says, 'Made in Japan' huh?...
Well, it could still be one of ours, Willard. Is there a serial number or anything like that, on it?...
X5307... er, let me look that up, Willard, just a minute...
Oh boy!... you've found a beauty there, Willard. Ha! ha!... d'ya know how powerful that baby is?...
Six city blocks, Willard. ha! ha!...
What d'ya mean , you'll call me back?...
There's a phonebox seven blocks away...
Now, stop that whining, Willard!...
Willard, I know this is dangerous, but if we can save one human life...
Oh, that's the way you feel about, huh?...
Look Willard, control yourself now...
Listen Willard, according to this, there's a... Er, how long has that thing been ticking?...
About 5 - 6 minutes, huh?...
Oh!... Er... nothing, Willard, nothing... we're just gonna have to work a little faster than I thought!
Willard, according to the manual here, about six inches from the tail-end of it, there's a plate...
Yeh, and it's held on by four screws...
Now it says, now this is very important, it says, 'This plate should be removed with an LT5 screwdriver with a plastic handle and a de-magnetised tip'...
Oh, you don't have one, huh?...
Augh!... use a coin then, Willard!...
Okay?... you got it off then, Willard?...
Boy! that thing sure is complicated... I can't make heads nor tails outa this...
No, don't worry, Willard, I'll get that thing fixed if it's the last thing... er, we'll take care of it, don't worry about it...
Listen Willard, there's a kind of a little hootymajig thing in there... a wheel of some kind! Why don't you try turning the wheel, Willard?...
Oh, I don't know... turn it to the left and see what happens...
I can hear it, Willard, it's ticking a lot faster, isn't it?...
Er!... you'd better turn it back, Willard!
Okay! let's see...
Listen, there are two wires here. It says here, 'Under no conditions...
Oh! someone's spilled coffee over this page...
Well, one is a kind of greyish-blue and the other one is a kind of er, bluish-grey...
Who are you talking to there?...
Willard, get him out of there! if that thing goes off, we're...
He says it's his?...
It's a toy torpedo?...
Willard, let me talk to the kid, will ya?...
He ran down to the beach with it?
Willard, I think you'd better come into the office, we ought to have a little talk... you hung me up here for ten minutes because of a kid...
What was that noise?...
The toy torpedo just sunk a fishing trawler, huh?
Well, that's alright, Willard... it's out of our hands now, 'cos now its in the Coast Guard's, right?...

01 October 2009

Sometimes Wisdom is Clear...othertimes it is like the morning Mist just waiting for the Sun

If you want your dreams to come true, you mustn't oversleep.

Of all the things you wear, your expression is the most important.

The best vitamin for making friends..... B1.

The happiness of your life depends on the quality of your thoughts.

The heaviest thing you can carry is a grudge.

One thing you can give and still keep...is your word.

You lie the loudest when you lie to yourself

If you lack the courage to start, you have already finished.

One thing you can't recycle is wasted time.

Ideas won't work unless 'You' do.

Your mind is like a parachute...it functions only when open.

The pursuit of happiness is the chase of a lifetime! It is never too late to become what you might have been.

Life is too short to wake up with regrets. So love the people who treat you right Forget about the ones who don't. Believe everything happens for a reason. If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it.

Friends are like balloons; once you let them go, you might not get them back. Sometimes we get so busy with our own lives and problems that we may not even notice that we've let them fly away. Sometimes we are so caught up in who's right and who's wrong that we forget what's right and wrong. Sometimes we just don't realise what real friendship means until it is too late.