Something I wrote a while back, for the writing group I belong to... a very tortured storyline followed on from this for the character I write about and I wanted to capture it before it gets lost on the ether of time; hence it is posted here.
The Reality of Me
Leave me alone, lost in my life
without meaning, caught up
entangled in threads of deceit
Drifting alone, Needing no-one
wanting no-one to be close
Because it causes pain
It makes me alive, and that's not the reality of me
I exist, I don't live
Yet I breathe.
Not wanting this, not daring to try
Paying the price of a past that is then, now and yet to be
Never free of the things I have done
of what I have become
The person that is me.