Children in Need Day

Don't worry this isn't a plug for money, nor what events are on in the local area or even in the country and while I do support the charity that isn't what this post is about.

I was watching a programme on BBC3 The World's Strictest Parents, this time from Lebanon with Iman and her husband and family taking in two british teenagers Debbie and Daniel. It started off in the usual way, showing the teenagers at their worst with their family, swearing, drinking etc and then the time they spent in Lebanon including time at a school.

I started to really have some sympathy for Debbie, who uses make-up and the way she dresses to avoid bullying and this led also to some of the problems with her family and being able to apologise without feeling as though she has lost the argument. Even Daniel, as the week grew on, had a minor revelation in that doing something as simple as mending bikes (it might be for him but to me it is a major skill) for a children's orphanage.

Both of them benefitted from the experience, not just the change in culture but it allowed them to see for themselves the effect their behaviour had, not only on themselves but also on their families.

So what do Children need, well for certain it isn't carte blanche for bad behaviour none of us are angels, but they do need parents who care for them enough to set standards for them to adhere to and appropriate discipline when they go wrong. This won't please the politically correct brigade who have empowered the children in this country with so many rights that it is hard to do anything but stand back and let them self-destruct.

SOH when he worked as a prison officer, had to escort children as young as 10 to court, and not always for serious offences, though those happened as well. In this instance the child's case was thrown out of court but it was only brought because the adult in charge of him saw fit to involve the police when normally a discipline should and could have been used.

On the news today, there is an increase of over 900% of children receiving asbo's, incarceration orders etc since the introduction of Rights of the Child, so it plain to see that what we have is not working and what is needed is for all of us adults to ensure that the children of tomorrow are given better behaviour guidelines, protection from themselves and appropriate standards for them to adhere to or the situation will only get much worse in the future.

Don't get me wrong I am not advocating the bad old days of cane and belt where abuse was standard in most homes. But parents being able to say No and mean it, and following it up with appropriate discipline and not giving in for a quiet life. How many times have I heard parents say "No please don't do that" to children in public, only to repeat it over and over again. Somehow parenting seems to be evolving into bargaining with them.